Sober hobbies… or the lack thereof

I’ve recently cut out booze. It’s great and I feel great and all of those things, but it can be pretty boring too. I’ve found that my weekends, now unriddled with hangovers, have blocks of spare time that I don’t know what to do with. So, I’ve resorted to finding things (however unpractical they may be) to fill my time. My mother gave me the advice to retrace my steps through my childhood, remembering what used to bring me so much joy before I found a group of friends and a bottle of tequila. Think about it, what brings your heart immense joy that doesn’t involve other people or substances? Maybe that doesn’t sound like an outlandish question to you, but it was for me. And it’s something I’ve been noodling on for months now - since January to be exact.

My father and my brother are what you call ‘serial hobbyists’. For as long as I can remember, my dad had a hobby. It changed every few years and was always on the more niche side, but it was fucking cool. He would pick up something like leatherwork, dive completely head first into the sport by buying all of the best tools, taking classes, watching videos, learning as much as he could. It seemed so moot at the time, but it kept him busy and brought him social capital in a way. It’s such a random skill you would never need, but what a cool thing to be able to do? And my brother does the same. He jumped from surfing obsessively, to shaping surfboards, to art, and now spends 95% of his time restoring 70s and 80s choppers. SO fucking cool. And so I want something. But, I wouldn’t say I’m particularly talented and I don’t want something that drains the bank. So there are a few things I’ve been chewing on.

Baking has been my first one. It does the trick. I like using my hands and more than anything, I like having something to give to people. It’s lovely to show up places with something made with love. It’s also given me a great barrier when I go to social activities that involve drinking. I immediately have an out: I wait for the cake to be cut and then I can gracefully get back in my car and scurry home where Molly Marie and a sink full of dishes await.

But I wouldn’t say that this is necessarily something I love or am passionate about. I’m not driven to perfect recipes or try new ones. I bake what I know how to bake and keep it relatively simple - and it works great for now. But I don’t see myself doing it for a long time - but again, social capital. It’s nice to know that I know how to bake. And in the future, I have a few recipes in my back pocket in case I need to make the best tasting carrot cake you’ve ever had or a standard banana bread when guests are coming to visit.

What’s next? I don’t know. I’ve gone back and forth with producing or learning how to DJ. It sounds like a lot of work and a high barrier to entry. Needlepoint sounds uninteresting. I have arthritis so knitting won’t work. Exercising doesn’t count, I can’t draw or paint well, I’m too cheap to start pottery classes, and I live 20 mins (way too far) from the Mission Beach boardwalk to consistently rollerblade.

I’ll keep you updated.